Critique My Poem: Life and Death?
Between life and death there is fine line
Death can come in a flash
Life can be gone in a flicker
Live your life like it is forever
Conquer fear of death by desire
Immerse your self in pleasure
Breathe the air and feel better
Life can be short as no one can figure
Do not count the days
Do not feel distress for tomorrow
Do not immerse your self with sorrow
Smile life is funnier than ever
I am sorry for this depressing poem.
I have 22 poems in:
I agree about expanding your vocabulary. This is not a depressing poem, but one of hope and acknowledgement about the fine line between life and death. Most people don’t face that — I have – you’ve caught it well.